Dear Missguided Queen,
Making a big decision, my girls are young women out on their own now, I’m leaving my husband of 26 years, because of his drugs and abuse, my 20 year old is not happy with me. Any advice?
Still leave your husband. If that’s what YOU WANT TO DO, BY GOD, YOU DO IT!
She is a grown woman living on her own. You have probably wanted to leave for a while but waited for the girls to get older? You’re going to have to let her know a few things up front
- You’re still going to leave
- How she feels about the situation is NOT how you feel about it
- You understand that she feels sadness and is nervous about the change
- Explain how you feel without bad mouthing the husband
We always expect smaller kids or teens to have a hard time with divorce but even as adults it can affect us. It’s the thought of two separate holidays, selling their childhood home, and wondering how you both will interact at future things like graduations, weddings, and grandchildren’s birthdays.
YOU WILL ALWAYS HAVE TO CO-PARENT! BE CIVIL!
So it’s still scary for her, but you’ve done your part and raised her into adulthood and hopefully into a strong self-sufficient young women (from what is sounds like). She will be fine EVENTUALLY.
But Mom this choice is yours and yours alone. And don’t feel guilty. You’re kids are grown and self sufficient. It’s time to invent in YOU!
bEST oF lUCK